Now we’ve talked about the importance of sexual confidence, but we haven’t really given any steps as to how to achieve it. Now becoming more confident in one area of life can often lead one down the rabbit hole of self-improvement in the general sense. I’m going to try to avoid going too deep into that rabbit hole, but to an extent it is unavoidable. To understand confidence we have to understand the opposite of condidence, insecurity and fear. An important step in establishing sexual confidence (or any confidence for that matter) is the ability to identify your fears and insecurities and then confront and conquer them.Often men try and skip creating these strong sexual foundations by looking up some quick sex or foreplay tip, while they can often get a small short term increase in sexual ability; they will still only be experiencing the tip of the iceberg, as well as only giving his partner the tip of the iceberg.
I’ll go over some of the most common male sex fears. I’ll break them down and give steps to defeating them.
1 – Performance Anxiety
Interestingly enough, the number 1 fear that prevents men from being good in bed is the fear of being bad in bed. This can often be a self-fulfilling prophecy. A man fears being bad in bed, he runs through all the bad scenarios that could happen. He sees in his head the sex being awkward, him being clumsy. Is it any surprise that this what he ends up doing? If this is one of your fears here’s a simple exercise for you. Next time you get the bad images occurring in your head, you see yourself messing up, etc; I want you to stop yourself, realize what you’re doing and then change the script. I want you to picture victory instead of failure, dominance over anxiety. Picture you ravaging her with lust, her getting off over and over again. Picture yourself using some of the techniques on this website, then use them!
2- Fear of comparison
Maybe you fear (or know) that you can’t compare sexually to one of her previous sexual partners. Knowing that your woman has had mind-blowing sex with another man can be a rough pill to swallow for some. I’d like to demonstrate a remedy from a personal example. I remember the last time I had trouble with the fear of comparison. I was visiting my girlfriend while she had some of her girlfriends over. They were discussing the hottest men in Hollywood. I knew my girlfriend was a big fan of Johnny Depp. One of the girlfriends brought up Johnny Depp and my girlfriend said “Who would there even be without Johnny Depp?” and then she said “Hugh Jackman, that’s who.” “Great” I thought, now I have to compare myself to Johnny Depp and Hugh Jackman? Then I had a realization, I realized that if she were with Johnny Depp, Hugh Jackman wouldn’t be any less appealing or attractive. You becoming more attractive does not make other men less attractive. The opposite is also true, Hugh Jackman being really attractive, doesn’t make you any less. There is nothing anybody can do about this, except accept this fact and move on. There comes a point where you need to stop being insecure about being compared to great men, and accept your rank amongst them.
3- Penal fears
I’m going to lump together two different fears. I’m also only going to go over them very briefly because they both have their own articles coming very soon. The two fears are fear of premature ejaculation and the fear of having a small penis. Now premature ejaculation can be conquered either mentally or physically, preferably both. But I can guarantee any man who suffers from P.E. that the more they worry about it the more it will destroy them. There are ways to physically fight P.E. there are a variety of exercises one can use to strengthen the P.C. muscle and gain control over ejaculation. However P.E. is much like fear of performance anxiety. When a man sees it in his head over and over again, he fulfills it.
The idea of having a penis that is too small can be absolutely crippling to a man. How else could Extenze stay in business? Because men fearing their penis is too small is a very real and widespread fear. Again, there are mental and physical ways of fighting this fear. There are sexual positions that having a smaller penis gives you an advantage to stimulating a woman. Again, like with the fear of performance anxiety the more you worry about it, the more you picture it beating you up, the more it will. One of the biggest advantages a well-endowed man has over an average sized man is the original sense of sexual confidence. A well-endowed man is excited to use his large member, he becomes to busy thinking about delivering mind blowing pleasure (a self fulfilling prophecy regardless of size) that he does. Where an average man hesitates, the well-endowed man is instilled with confidence. Once you realize that a big member actually enhances sexual performance because of how it influences the man mentally, you can create that confidence regardless of your size, you can create that mental imagery of dominating a woman you can share that excitement for sex, you can eliminate the common fears; and experience the same results regardless of size.
